Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize