He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
