Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
i've created a new STD.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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