there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
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