I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Sorry my hands just texted you
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
