can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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