i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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