you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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