Betty ford says i'm here all night
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
