Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
