There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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