We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
