Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I am midnight drunk by noon
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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