i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
