So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Walk of Shame today included voting.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
