Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
