he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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