'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
