I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
