Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Randomize
