Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
what day is it and did you see me today?
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
