awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Randomize
