How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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