Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
