so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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