You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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