Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
