I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
