A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
