I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize
