How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
