He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i think my mom watched the whole time
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
