Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
