i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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