i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize
