so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
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