So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
