the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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