Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
