Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Randomize
