She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
