you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
