she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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