Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
