Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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