I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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