Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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