Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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