At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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