Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Your dad touched me again.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
