My hand turned me down
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
